In light of the new revelations about a certain American actor, the #Me Too hashtag has sadly become even more relevant than it already was ..
According to Wikipedia (quote) “#Me too became a two-word hashtag used on social media in 2017 to denounce sexual assault and harassment, in the wake of sexual misconduct allegations against Harvey Weinstein . The phrase had been used more than 200,000 times by October 15, and tweeted more than 500,000 times by October 16. The hashtag has been used over 600,000 times on Facebook resulting in more than 6 million discussions about sexual abuse and harassment. Alyssa Milano encouraged use of the word as part of an awareness campaign to show the scale and ubiquity of the problem.”
I’m never one to go with a trend just for the sake of it, yet the trending #Me Too phenomenon has opened even my eyes to one of the unspoken occurrences that people seem to live with in everyday life. People I see nearly every day, who carry this pain which can effect their lives and relationships, mentally and physically at the time, and as they get older. As a Reiki practitioner, I have come across this hidden pain in my clients many times.
Rather than just following a trend, people are finding the courage to speak out on something that has, up to now, been considered as “something to keep to oneself”. Taboo. Even thinking it could be their fault, and feeling embarrassment for having had it happen.
Being one of the many women, men and children who have in some form experienced sexual harassment, rape or sexual assault in their lives, I feel I can comment on this from the perspective of the … mmm i don’t like the word “Victim” .. maybe “Assaultee”?
Abuse and sexual abuse can take many forms but it basically comes down to not respecting peoples’ boundaries, and doing something that they know they would not have the persons permission to do if they had asked. But let’s delve a little deeper here.
I have talked before about people having different perceptions. I also believe that people CHOOSE not to see things. Or they convince themselves that what is seen as the wrong thing to them, is perfectly fine because of
- their circumstances
- who they are
- what’s happened to them
- what so and so or even a deity told them to do
There is something deep down that tells the truth. But to allow these people to have what they want, they change the truth and their perception, to fit in with what they want. How many terrorists, serial killers, dictators, politicians even, have convinced themselves they are contributing to the good of society by causing the deaths of their chosen ones.
Many people have grown up with the influence of parents who think a quick feel of a lass who’s “Up for it” is OK. (“Up for it” – a phrase that, to those people at least, can mean anything from wearing tight or provocative clothes, to just being female).
Many people have grown up with mothers who turn a blind eye …. leaving a child to think “It must be OK because mum hasn’t said anything”.
Men who are victims of sexual assault or harrassment, on the other hand, have been made to feel embarassment, or to feel ‘un-manly’.
Males and females are just as responsible for this culture . And we can change it, by showing the next generation that it’s wrong.
We don’t teach our children to speak out about these things enough. Maybe its the ‘stiff upper lip’ culture or the ‘shame the victim’ effect that puts people off.
In one of my own experiences I kept quiet so as not to upset innocent parties. Most likely now, I never will say anything about the incident, as I feel that the time has gone for saying something. I have stepped away from the people involved….
There are hundreds of reasons not to speak out. But if our kids see this type of predatory behaviour in front of them, and don’t see the backlash, they may grow up to think its OK too.
We need our children, both boys and girls, to shout out “No this is unacceptable”
There is a strong urge in this patriarchal society to keep women down, and i guess sexual abuse is a great tool to do just that. But but there is also a rising number of men coming forward to say that they too were sexually abused, often as children. This creates not only shame but hidden blockages of energy that create illness. Men have the added challenge of being a ‘Man’ about it…afraid of being labelled or their gender questioned. Men are not given the freedom to show their feelings in a safe way, and this can lead to built up aggression.
We are seeing now a new acceptability for men to show their feelings, and it can only lead to good things. It might take some adapting to, but maybe more peaceful times might come from it.
Hopefully the #Me Too campaign has opened up this taboo subject, and can help us see where we have gone wrong as a society. We can talk more and deal with things. We can give stronger boundaries to our children and allow them strong will, to create less inner guilt and more strength of character, so they will shout it out if something is wrong for them.
Our children will no longer be following the herd, but growing their own persona, not feeling afraid to disagree, and all the while keeping the connection of love in the way of consciousness. The phrase ‘we are all connected ‘ does not mean we have to follow a herd mentality. We can speak out and not be afraid to be noticed. We can stand together and say ‘No More”.